I promised to do a short update, so I'm going to keep it really short.

US politicians apparently don't care about what the rest of the world thinks. We've got a baaaaad image apparently. Does this strike anyone else as disturbing? Not surprising, just disturbing.

Ford's got more problems than you think. First they were having problems with the tires on their SUV's, now they're having problems with exploding airbags.

If any of you eat sugary breakfast cereals, it turns out they're just as bad for you as a cookie. Funny how cookies are called "biscuits" in the United Kingdom. Even funnier that people actually care about it this much.

In even more interesting news, a 3 year-old girl assaulted a police officer when he tried to help her out. I think I'd pay money to see a 3 year-old fight back against the police.

Last but not least is another Onion article. Just click here and enjoy.

You know, posting needlessly is fun. Posting recklessly is even more fun...

So much to see today, I may either split the update in two, update another day, or just plain forget it all together. If i do two in one day, everyone will accuse me of having too much free time. Somehow, this sounds appealing.

As always on Wednesday, we'll start with an update from Free Will Horoscopes:

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
I was simmering in a heated mud bath at an outdoor spa in Southern California. The gooey blend of clay, peat moss, and water from a local hot spring surrounded me up to my neck. A tangy, earthy fragrance provided the perfect aromatherapy, while warm winds swooned rhythmically through the pine trees above me. "This is exactly what every Virgo needs right now," I thought to myself, "to be held in the erotic, comforting embrace of the Mother Earth; gently cooked in an alchemical stew of earth, fire, water, and air; suspended outside of time in a place that's a cross between being in the grave and being in the womb."

That actually sounds kinda nice. Becoming one with nature and all that...

Scientists in Berkeley (of all places) have started to develop spy bugs for the US government. Funny that the most well-known liberal university in California decides to do some work for "The Man." Instead of complaining about a governement contract, they complain about coffee. Priorities anyone?

If you've seen the recent beachings of these pilot whales, this news may be disheartening. It is sad that there's nothing more they could do for these poor suckers. I don't think I quite understand the beached whale phenomena, more reading may reveal an answer.

The increasing amount of junk mail is starting to drive me crazy, and I'm sure others as well. It's nice to see the Federal Trade Commision do something about it, especially when these scams are so paper thin.

For all you fans of the movie X-Men, you may want to see the list of new mutants that may be appearing in the sequel. Not so new to me, but if you haven't heard already, you may be intrigued. Of all places, MTV has the news right here.

Screw the RIAA

To take us out on a lighter note, we have an article from The Onion for your enjoyment. Clickit.

When you're driving along in your car do you stress out crazily during the commute, or are you one of those people that sings at the top of their lungs, belting out the song for the whole world to hear?

If you're one of the latter, I applaud you for having some spark of life within you. Driving alone is such a pain, especially during a long commute. People stress out too much, talk on their cell phones, and spend too much time trying to cut off the person in the next lane just so they can get home as fast as possible. Home isn't going anywhere. It's not like the person next to you is trying to get to your house before you. Why race? Relax, sing along and enjoy the ride. I recommend shutting off your phones and trying it for a day. How often do we actually get so much time to ourselves anyway when we complain about not having enough time in the first place?

Once more into the breach dear friends. I think I'll end our little soiree into past cartoonists with the most well-known cartoonist this side of Walt Disney. Charles M. Schulz began Peanuts in the 50's, and never stopped writing or drawing the strip until he died in February of 2000 due to complications stemming from cancer. His strips have become icons of the last century, becoming so ingrained in our culture, that the Peanuts strip continues to this day in the form of "Classic Peanuts." It was his family's wish that the strip not be continued by another artist, and rightfully so. It's unimaginable to me that any person could capture the simplicity of observation or Schulz brought to life in his illustrations. Many may not agree with the spiritual aspect of some of his strips, or may cite Peanuts as irrelevant in a time when we believe irony has died. Fact is, we can never discount the relevance of a strip in which the main character, no matter how much of a loser Charlie Brown is, remains an optimist. I'll continue a tour of cartoonists as they come along, but Charles Schulz is perhaps the founder of the modern era of strips, and a fitting individual with which to end our brief tour.

For more information on the peanuts strip, visit the Peanuts home page. For more info on Charles M. Schulz, visit the Charles M. Schulz home page. Coincidentally, this August brings the opening of the Schulz museum in Santa Rosa, California.

Geez it's monday again. Isn't it lovely to actually appreciate a weekend when you can? I think it's somewhat fabulous, but at the same time, I wish I had more of a weekend to enjoy. Perhaps we should all switch to a four-day work week. Sound appealing? Besides all that, Monday brings new news. Revel in it if you haven't heard about it already.

Perhaps in world's laziest news, an overweight man is the lead plaintiff in a lawsuit versus notable fast-food chains for making him fat. I wish someone could sue them for being lazy. Cook once in a while, exercise, you people don't need to sue these places to know they make you fat.

If you've been sleeping under a rock, or trying to beat the crowds, and haven't seen Austin Powers in Goldmember yet, I suggest you take a look at what is perhaps the funniest one in the series. In my opinion, the ending was a bit forced, but since it set a box-office record, it's hard to believe most people would agree with that sentiment.

In music, if people haven't noticed already, there's a Britney Spears backlash underway with some noticable female singer-songwriters taking the forefront. It was only a matter of time before people started getting smart again. Now it should be interesting to see what happens when Christina Aguilera's new album comes out this fall...

Anti-gravity movement sweeps Boeing off its feet. It's like a thing of the future. And very appropriate that this technology came about from a half-baked experiment. Some people are just satisfied with a good idea and no sound practices. Maybe this will actually go somewhere, wouldn't it be cool to have anti-gravity belts?

In a typical high-tech move, people with mp3 players are starting to fancy themselves digital DJ's. At least it's better than a wedding dj. Who wants to hear Kool and the Gang's "Celebrate" five times over a 2 hour period?

The next movie from Steven Soderbergh, Full Frontal has a pretty informative website. Check it out for some more info on this new, somewhat independent-minded film.

That's all for now, perhaps I'll update later if things don't get too busy around here.

Pet peeves.

Pet peeves for me don't come by that easily. I like to think that I'm fairly patient. I'm not quick to anger and I don't lash out with violence or anything like that. The one thing that irks me though, is a loud eater. Someone who smacks, slurps, and gulps their food down with great enthusiasm. A good example is watching any commercial for Carl's Jr. where the eater chomps, licks, and slobbers there way through a simple hamburger. It's mostly irritating that there is no other background noise since the commercial is dominated by someone with slovenly manners. I can tolerate somone making noise if I happen to be eating, but when my officemate eats a banana in the quietude of our office, he mushily chews his way through so loudly I almost want to turn around and throw something at him. I guess that's what headphones are for: keeping me sane.

Anyhow, a short, neat update of cool stuff for perusing. First off, Something Awful has a new Photoshop Phriday either for your disgust or amusement. The idea is there's a theme that some crazy people with way too much time on their hands run away with madly in Photoshop tweaking and destroying recognizeable images. Sometimes offensive, always awful. Check it out, but don't say I didn't warn you.

Also, you've seen this guy's work before, but you may not know it. Geoff Darrow has a lengthy interview about some upcoming stuff he's involved with. Most notably, his work on the Matrix. Extremely detailed and usually stunningly brutal, his linework makes my head spin. Give it a whirl.

Friday means Flash. Artists may also be present.

Digital Dogma
Evan Hecox
Magic Cube
Skeleton
_Glassworks_
FlashLevel
Identikal
Bloc Media

Just as an experiment, I thought I'd post a short blah kinda story. Hope you enjoy.

Leave Your Nose In

I open my door to find a jackrabbit sprawled across the road, on his back. Determined to escape my car seat, I set out amongst my brother cacti, standing defiantly in the desert wind. Without great effort, I manage to trip and land on my neck. Practically breaking it in the process. Bloodied from the experience, getting up takes more energy minus the hydration.

Two steps more into the white; steam rises from the engine block. While I crawl on my feet, my Ford heaves its last breath. No matter, I’ll just hitch a ride from some unsuspecting Samaritan. The knife in my hand hums a wicked ditty at the thought.

My sweat has evaporated from the red skin on my back. The wind picks up speed and kicks up dust into my eyes and mouth. The grit tastes like day-old bread.

The sparse blades of grass smile and laugh at me. I’m not the only one lacking moisture. Let’s just pretend we don’t hear them. I look at my left hand, half expecting my knife, half expecting my hand being gnawed off by a coyote. What I do get to see is a half-empty palm covered in searing blisters. If it hadn’t been for that fire, maybe I’d still have that dream of being a multi-million-dollar hand model.

Now I’m circling the landing zone. It’s almost a craterous mass of empty land, but the screaming air is thick enough to obscure its girth. I’d swear there were animals, but things are starting to get sloppy. My foot doesn't work anymore. I think I’ve been dragging it for hours now.

Out the window’s where she threw her voice. My brand new “borrowed” Rolex smiled at me with the sheen of the sun on its face. While stars exploded against my fist, N’Sync drones away on the radio. The sound of you-didn’t-have-to-hit-me smacks my right eardrum, and I remember to dump the excess cargo out the passenger side. It rolls with dull, animal, thuds across the prairie: A human tumbleweed.

A metallic glint catches the milkiness of my third eye. One of my fillings comes out at the same time and I spit out the solid pain. Folding in half, I pick up a patch of human hair, turn around, walk away, and follow the yellow strip towards the mushroom cloud in my future…

Thursday again. Do I have a haiku for you? Why yes I do:

As children we laughed
At cartoons and played all day.
Growing up sure sucks.

News, news, news. Is there ever any shortage of strangeness in this world? Nope, but that's what makes it so fascinating, right? Only if you're weird like me I guess.

Yet another wonderful Free Will Horoscope:

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
If I were your psychotherapist, I'd urge you to talk to me about control and manipulation, about dominance and surrender, about how to transform power struggles into exercises in mutual empowerment. Whereupon maybe you'd blurt out, "No way, man! I'm bone-weary of you always trying to regulate what we discuss. In fact, I'm sick and tired of everyone who tries to move me in the direction they want to go without any regard for where I want to go." And this, Virgo, would be the exact response I'd have hoped to elicit from you. It would blast away your excessive humility, maybe even purge the compulsive aspects of your desire to be of service. I bet you'd then set out on a quest to claim the authority and command you have forbidden yourself from owning all these years.

Sounds like I'm on the right track already. I can't remember the last time I actually bent to someone's will in a while. Always gotta stand up for myself.

Ever been to a restaurant where they have one of those huge chocolate cakes. They always proclaim, "Death by chocolate." Here's a literal example.

Remember The Stand by Steven King, where the world's population is almost wiped out by a 'superflu?' Well, we've always been afraid that our antibiotics may not keep up with bacterial evolution. Looks like it's finally happened. I don't believe we have anything to worry about yet, but the prospect is still somewhat frightening.

With Napster having been beaten to submission by the recording industry, everyone's fleed to the nearest peer to peer network to assume anonymity from "The Man." Someone out there wants to take it all away from us and invade our privacy at the same time by proposing that these companies be able to hack into our computers. When are they going to realize that no matter what they try to do, there's always going to be another way to share files from computer to computer? Technology won't die because they have more money than anyone else...

Bay area has some interesting news for us. Mostly because it also happens to be the most liberal area of California. San Francisco is considering publicly growing marijuana in the city in order to supply the drug for medicinal purposes. On another note in the bay area, a high schooler burned down a great deal of his school and now has to pay up to $2 million in damages. All because he wanted some extra time to light up a joint. Gives new meaning to the term Boy Sets Fire.

Music news has Weezer planning on releasing their new album soon. Catch is, it will only be sold in independent record stores. I for one like this idea. Having seen other bands shill out unique CD's for companies such as Wal-Mart makes me feel ill.

Ever watch uncoordinated people try to dance or do aerobics. For me it's almost painful and sad at the same time. But at least they're trying to have fun. I almost want to walk up to them, tap them on the shoulder and congratulate them on their courage because I'm sure they know they either don't have rythm, style, grace, or a combination of the three. It reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine tries to dance. She's trying so hard and thinks she's doing so well, but all she does is expose her lack of coordination.

I sure hope that's not me...

The tour of legendary cartoonists that have passed on continues with Chuck Jones. Chuck Jones is perhaps one of the greatest animators of our time, even if you don't know who he is, more than likely you've seen his work. Refreshing memories is pretty easy, considering that he created some of the more memorable characters in the Warner Brothers Studios stable. The Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote series, the amorous Pepe Le Pew, and Marvin the Martian are just a few of the many, many characters he was responsible for giving life. Many animators still cite him as a great influence on their work. His absurd humor, storytelling style, and techniques are still prevalent in modern animation today, and the looks of Warner Brothers characters created after his tenure still bear his artistic stamp. Not only can I name him as an important figure in animation, but I also happen to share a birthday with him, cool. He died February 22, 2002.

Monday's are always nice and busy news days. It's like the entire world takes a vacation for the weekend and pukes up stacks of news bits they've been saving up. Either that, or I just don't pay too much attention to news over the weekend.

Some people have gotten free Prozac in the mail as a product promotion. Somehow, the distributing company received pharmaceutical information about certain people in order to have the drug sent to their house, and now (as is what happens often in America) people are suing. Fun for all involved. Hope they're happy.

There's an interesting example of cold war paranoia being revealed here. Appears that Charlie Chaplin was denied knighthood for quite some time due to his communist sympathies. The fact that two of his wives were 16 may have had something to do with it also, but my money's on the communist theory. It's amazing how much of a stigma was associated with having an open mind politically back then. I guess there still is some evidence today, but how many great communist powers are left in the world besides China and Cuba?

A small girl thought she could be Harry Potter and injured herself. You know things like this have happened many times in the past. Before we were born even, but it takes a selfish society to blame movies for bad parenting. I'm not saying the woman is a bad mother... Oh wait, I am.

News in D.C. is that a bill is on the floor to make raves and rave paraphernalia illegal. I'm not sure how to take this. On one hand, people that dress in neon and suck on pacifiers are mindless twits. On the other hand, comparing a rave to a crack house is pretty severe. I don't remember the last time I saw a meth lab at a club, but apparently the government does.

Lucky bastards.

Lastly, here's a good article on why graphic novels are so keen to be brought to film lately. Check it out for a brief explanation on why sequential storytelling is a unique and versatile art form.

Lots of neat stuff to post on the Trash Heap today. No news, just some Friday flashy goodness to brighten your day or broaden your minds.

Wrecked
Robot Duck
Evolution Bureau
Flash First Aid
Fantasy Interfaces
Think Collective
Habitat 7
Marshall A. Jones
Yooco Tanimoto

It's Haiku Time:

Great black, hurting pain
Deep, tremendous, biting angst
The last cookie: gone

Thought I'd also dump some news all y'all's way. Lots of stuff to read about this week. Some fun, some not so fun, but hopefully all informative. Keep your eyes peeled, and your ears open.

America's got a new group of people promoting themselves in the wake of the 'One nation, under God' row. Seems like some people just feel it encroaches on their rights for some segments of American life to be remotely spiritual. In response, these groups are banding together to show their solidarity for the separation of Church and State.

On that note, it might also be interesting to mention that the Jehovah's Witnesses have a peculiar practice of protecting their sex offenders. I don't know much about their religion, or if this is a wide-spread practice, but it seems a little odd to me. Don't you think?

The Los Angeles Times had an interesting article on digital buddies (registration required). I once took a class on user interfaces, agents, and artificial intelligence, so it's amazing that some of what I learned is actually quite true in this instance. As far as how language and context alters your perceptions of an artificial agent is concerned, you could be speaking to a computer everytime you message someone. Creepy...

One more pretty cool bit. TNN will be producing and airing new episodes of "Ren & Stimpy" soon, under the direction of the original creator and with a more 'mature' tone. Read about it. I remember watching that show and either being totally freaked out, or just laughing like crazy from the randomness. Not exactly contagious as it is infectious, I really liked that show.

In October, Dark Horse Comics will release the sequel to Masamune Shirow's Ghost in the Shell, titled: "Man-Machine Interface." Originally published last year in Japan, the english language version will not include explicit material published in Japan at the artist's request. Having read the first edition, I'm definitely going to be looking into this as the original had thoughtful insights on how techno-centric the world is becoming. Plus the art is pretty good looking as well. The mini-series will run for 12 issues. For more information, click here.

News to be had around the world, sorted to suit your interests or disinterists as it were.

They've found cocaine in the bloodstream of the man who was piloting Aaliyah's plane when it crashed. Check out the rest of the story here.

Lance Bass: N'Space

Again, this week's Free Will Horoscope puts a positive spin on something kinda disheartening:

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Science fiction writer Theodore Sturgeon was once asked why 90 percent of the books in his chosen field were so bad. "Ninety percent of everything is crap," he replied (or, by some accounts, "Ninety percent of everything is crud"). My own estimate of the crud factor is in the 75 percent range, but I do agree that most fields of endeavor and spheres of activity are dominated by mediocrity. That's the bad news, Virgo. The good news is that the rare pockets of excellence are now far more visible to you than usual. They're also more available and usable. And so I say unto you, Pluck and enjoy all the non-crappy treasures.

Maybe I should stop trying to do all those things I suck at. No one ever said being average meant being exciting.

In a bland attempt to get more people to buy their 'food,' McDonald's has started selling rice in their Asian franchises. If they meet with more success there, I think they should stop selling 'McRib' sandwiches and 'Flat Bread' sandwiches over here. Fake food makes me quiver...

And a final note of interest for all of you who may have seen "The Road to Perdition" already. Time Magazine has a short review of the original material the movie was based on that you may or may not find interesting. Check it out.

No more at this moment, more to come later, perhapsss...

Something new I've seen on the street lately: Bullet hole decals.

Why on earth would anyone want to make it seem like their car had been shot? I have no clue what this is supposed to say about you and your car, but if you'd actually been in an area where your car CAN get shot, I don't think you want it to. The idea that you're 'hardcore' enough to get shot at is absurd. Especially since I've actually seen these decals on a Volvo and on a car driven with another decal proclaiming the driver as 'Soccer Mom.' Personalizing your car is a nice idea. I mean, it's one car out of a thousand others like it, might as well make it unique. Decals are probably the most tacky way to do so, especially if it involves Calvin (an unofficial Calvin by the way) urinating on anything. If you are going to personalize your car, do it nicely, with a license plate, something funky hanging from your rear view, or even by making it faster with some sort of engine modification. Whatever you do, don't pretend to be something you're not.

Also, The Onion has a new look and new stories for today. Check it out when you have a chance. If you've ever gotten junk mail in your e-mail, you may appreciate the headlining 'story.'

Time for some education.

Some notable and influential cartoonists/artists have passed away since the year 2000 and I thought it would be appropriate to bring up some of them that you may or may not have heard of. One of these people happens to be Carl Barks. Barks was the man responsible for the creation of Scrooge McDuck and for drawing and writing many of the Disney comic books starring all the Disney Ducks. His stories, combining adventure, fantasy, and some social commentary, were considered some of the most definitive work on these Disney Characters, and his legacy lives on in many classic paintings such as this one. If you've ever seen Duck Tales, or cracked open a Disney comic book, Carl Barks is the man you have to thank for its feel and look. This painting is titled "Sport of Tycoons." Further information can be found by any simple web search.

Recently, I've been listening to the Red Hot Chili Peppers last album, "By The Way." I'd have to say this is probably my favorite of theirs to date. Some may be turned off since it's a great departure from what most are used to hearing from them, but I particulary like it 'cause it's so different. There's less funk and more melody, but the underlying smoothness remains. It's as if they took some of their more thoughtful songs from some of their albums and expanded upon those musical ideas. Favorite songs include: the title track By The Way, Can't Stop, Venice Queen, and Cabron.

If you haven't picked up this album yet, and are a fan, shame on you. If you aren't a fan, shame on you again. Buy this album. If you aren't fully convinced, then download these songs, and then buy the album. Everyone's entitled to their opinion, and this one just happens to be mine.

Once again, news for all.

If you haven't heard of Sesame Street's South African satellite's plan to introduce an HIV positive muppet, there's significant disapproval from America's Right Wing. Should be interesting to see if there's any further developments.

Remember how Penecillin was an accident? Looks like history may repeat itself.

Japanese proposed Concorde competitor: BOOM!

And for the nerd in all of us, we have a Random Star Wars title generator. Fun for the entire family. Or probably just for me.

That's all for now, more later.

Now I've been trying to figure out if it's incredibly hot around here, or if it's just me. I guess I don't have to worry about that anymore. Check out this bit of news from our friends at MSNBC.

Have you ever called someone a bitch, wanted someone to be your bitch, or decided that life's a bitch?

That makes you a bitch...

Wow, it's time for a daily helping of piping hot (well, more like lukewarm) news updates. Let's see what's on the menu today.

If anyone has seen the footage of that police officer beating down a 16 year-old, this news is going to come across as rather convenient for the LAPD.

Somehow, a mother still breast feeds her 8 year-old son. Shocking, isn't it.

A new study by the World Wildlife Fund seems to think the world will expire by 2050. Check out this disturbing piece of information.

I've never been to the south, but this story strikes me as somewhat disturbing.

And for all you Michelle Yeoh fans out there, the trailer for her new movie The Touch has been posted on the net. Check it out.

It also seems like Berkeley has found something new to complain about.

Here's your random link of the day!

That's all for now. Hope it's amusing.

Remember these guys? An '80's revival of sorts is going on in the comic book industry right now. A lot of artists and writers grew up on this stuff just like you and me, and now get to work on the cartoons that influenced them most.

Haiku Time:

Bubblegum goodness
Sticky, pink, chewy candy
All over my face.

It's raining outside.

Being from Southern California, we don't get a lot of rain out here since we technically live in a desert. Some people like the rain. They say it's relaxing, cleansing, etc. Me, I don't like it. Something about it is inherently depressing. Cliche, but if it wasn't for most people, then why would it be cliche? It's like sheets of misery coating the ground with bad luck. I don't mind being inside when it's raining. I get to listen to fat drops fall on the roof like a drumroll and fall asleep to its rythm. Being outside and getting soaked is just unfortunate circumstance for not having an umbrella handy. Maybe that's just stupidity?

To top it off, it's humid outside. One of my co-workers said, "It's like Tennessee out there."

Even though I've never been to Tennessee, I mysteriously agree with him.

I thought it might be entertaining for some people to have some news and links. Let's run through the day's findings, shall we?

Free Will Horoscope for this week makes me feel like I might have some sort of spiritual breakthrough sometime soon. Perhaps this is the karmic experience I've been waiting for so I can finally achieve Nirvana. Or maybe I'll just end up going to church again.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Every now and then, a week comes along that shakes you to your foundations with revelations of the divine purpose behind all your life's adventures. This is probably not one of those weeks, but it may be foreplay for one. As many sweaty geniuses have discovered, adroit breakthroughs frequently follow long, tedious attention to detail. And as many God-drunk converts have found, a brave confrontation with one's guilty conscience can often be the trigger for a cathartic religious experience.

Oh, and we have yet another reason to love our government. Nothing to see here folks, move along, move along...

Remember the boy who cried wolf, we now have the modern-day equivalent.

Some people love the Simpsons a little more obsessively then they should. Take this story for instance.

And for all of you out there who know what lomography is, here's a neat website dedicated to the peculiar art of taking multiple photos with one shot.

Somewhere, Charles Schulz is rolling over in his grave... laughing.

Do you find yourself using more amusing synonyms for certain words. Instead of blimp, you say dirigible. Instead of boxing, you say fisticuffs. Instead of motorcycle, you say motorbike.

You must be pretty old...

So I finally jump on the bandwagon and get myself a weblog. Does this make me trendy? Does it make me more internet savvy?

No.

It just means I have more time on my hands to try and prove to myself (and maybe others) that I have something clever to say. Isn't that why everyone else has a weblog? I guess this also means I shall have to be updating from time to time to let people know if something fascinating occurs in my life, if I have some brilliant observation, or if I'm just plain bored. Hope you all enjoy the trip through my brain.

This is my first post, don't we feel special.